The Adventures of the Snow Queen with Mr Frost and his Wooden Staff
by Alois21
Summary: [Jelsa] Once upon a time in a far away land, there was a fair ruler who befriended a mischievous winter spirit. Inside her grand castle, they embarked on the most ridiculous, most interesting, and quite possibly, most perverted journey of their lives. In which Mr. Frost's wooden staff is wielded at inappropriate moments, and the queen is too tense and too (up)tight.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:**

**(1) No profit was gained in the making and consequent publishing of this story. The Rise of the Guardians and Frozen franchises are copyrighted to their respective owners.**

**(2) Necessary changes may be applied to the characters without prior notice, including, but not limited to, their ages, personalities, background information, et cetera. Changes may deviate from the canon and/or may be borrowed from other stories.**

**(3) Each short story is a stand-alone, and on its own may be considered complete. They are, however, from the same universe, but with no strict timeframe being followed. This fanfiction, as a whole, can be considered finished, but new chapters may be added in irregular intervals. **

**(4) Although the story had been written with the intent of emulating children's story books, it contains matured themes that should be read at the reader's discretion.**

** I. **

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there lived a beautiful, young queen, gifted with the power over snow and ice. Her beauty was unparalleled, and all across the lands and the oceans, princes and peasants, foreigners and locals, men from all walks of life vied for her hand. They offered her their gold, their riches, and their lands. They offered her their hearts, their souls, and their devotions. But to each suitor that asked for her hand in marriage, the queen would unfailingly say 'no'.

And as it would happen, soon word of the queen's cold refusal swept the villages and the kingdoms. The townsfolk whispered of the sorcery and the curse that encased the queen's heart in ice and cruelness. _Why else would she refuse each and every one of her suitors_? They wondered. _Had no one been dashing enough to catch her eye?_

Hearsay were varied and ridiculous, but alas, no one had come close to the truth. After all, the world knew of the eternal winter from five summers back, but only the people of Arendelle were aware of what truly happened—along with one peculiar stranger, whose name was known all across the lands, but whose believers could only be counted among a few.

This fellow was known to appear only during the winters when he would nip at your nose and draw delicate patterns on your misty windows. His name was Jack Frost. He was very much real. And to the children of the world, he was a guardian of fun. But to the fair queen of Arendelle, what he guarded was something more… precious, more private.

But Mr. Frost was a mischievous fellow, and to the queen who had serious matters to attend, he was often seen as a troublemaker and a bully. And one day, the queen had enough of his naughty ways. She pounded her fist. She stomped her heel. She waved her arm and sent a powerful gust of wind that knocked Mr. Frost off his feet.

"Enough, Jack Frost." Ordered the queen. "Enough with your games! The courtroom is no place for your mischief! Out, out with you!" Huffed the queen.

But instead of turning away, Mr. Frost leapt off the ground, and floated to the flustered queen. "But your highness," said Mr. Frost, "I could not possibly leave you behind!"

"And why is that?" Challenged the queen. She crossed her arms, and frowned at Mr. Frost.

"Because your highness," said Mr. Frost as he lowered himself on the ground, and knelt on one knee before the queen. "Naughty kids need to be _punished_." The queen was taken aback, for Mr. Frost's impish tone had turned sleek and sultry, and somewhere south, south, _south_, the queen could feel a pleasant but fiery warmth blossom in her nether—

"OH MY GOD!" shrieked the queen, suddenly releasing a powerful blast of ice and snow that sent Mr. Frost flying away. "Oh my god, Jack! Heavens! I—_you_—the_ narration_—just—_JACK_!" cried the queen, too flustered to put together a sentence. She pointed to Mr. Frost and Mr. Frost was surprised. Such a rude gesture! Why would the queen use such a rude gesture? Mr. Frost paused to think.

"I'm hurt, your highness!" said he as he placed a hand over his heart. "Mr. Frost's got a _booboo _that only you could _kiss better_." But to his never-ending surprise, the fair queen suddenly summoned a gigantic snowstorm and aimed it at Mr. Frost. Mr. Frost was quite certain that if the snowstorm hit him square on, he would, even as an immortal, suffer from a world of pain, but all he could think about at that moment was the beautiful flush of the queen's pallid cheeks, the way her lips were pursued in concentration, the way her crystal eyes glimmered with strong determination, the way his sweater was _gloriously _clinging on to the queen's lithe form in _just the right places—_

"_Jack Frost!_" And Mr. Frost saw a flurry of snow white and ice blue hurtling at him in inhumane speed, before his vision exploded in a sea of stars and darkness. And with her nemesis in deep, deep slumber, peace had once again returned to the fair ruler of Arendelle.

**THE END!**

**Author's Note: Rest assured there will be more chapters to come. :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**II.**

Once upon a time, there was once a peaceful kingdom known as Arendelle. Its ruler was fair and wise and dear to her people, and blessed with a beautiful magic that could wield snow and ice. But though the queen was magnificent and loved by everyone, she remained alone: without a significant other whom she could share her life with; without a partner whom she could take to the formal balls with her, and glide and spin on the dance floor…

… without someone _who would just learn to respect the damn boundaries, for crying out loud, not even the head servant had seen me in my unmentionables—would you just close the godforsaken door, already? And—_no_! Goddamn it, stay on the _other _side—oh you know what, never mind, just, please, keep your hands to yourself and—_oh! Heavens_, Jack Frost, I need to be down there in five minutes—_no_, damn it, not _that_ down there—_oh. _Oh! _Ohhh…


	3. Chapter 3

**III.**

Once upon a time, the beautiful and wise queen of Arendelle was so busy with her duties that she had neglected her friends. Princess Anna, her younger sister, understood how demanding being a ruler was, and left queen Elsa to herself. Princess Anna instead busied herself with her boyfriend Kristoff and the magical snowman Olaf. They took to the forest and enjoyed a picnic.

For a while, Queen Elsa was in peace, for all her friends were not bothering her. But as she continued to draft an important document, a sudden thought occurred to her. Queen Elsa was very, very shy and she only has a few friends. She began counting through them in her mind: _one: Anna. Two: Olaf. Three: Kristoff. Four_-.

Queen Elsa gasped, for just as she remembered her fourth friend, he made himself known to her, as if she had called him through her mind. Jack Frost anchored his crooked pole on an arch of one of the high windows and swung inside. He floated inside the royal study, and slowly lowered himself to the ground.

"Hello, your majesty!" greeted Mr. Frost with a smile so huge and so bright, the queen was worried it might tear his face in two. The queen, despite her busyness, managed a small smile for Mr. Frost.

"Good morning, Jack. I'm sorry I can't play with you right now. I'm really busy."

But Mr. Frost could not understand the queen's situation. Everyday, without fail, he would visit the queen in her study, and everyday, without fail, she would refuse his company. Mr. Frost understood the first three weeks she could not play with him, when a dukedom called Weselton was pressuring Arendelle into another trading agreement and the queen was busy with her diplomatic duties. But on the fourth week, they came to an impasse, and all was peaceful again between the two countries.

And still, Queen Elsa refused to keep him company! _But not anymore! _Mr. Frost thought with a determined glint in his eyes. He slammed his palm on the table, startling the queen out of her concentration. She glared at him, prepared to chastise the naughty Mr. Frost, but without warning, he brought out his staff and wielded and wiggled and dragged and dangled it by Queen's face.

The beautiful queen was so flustered that her entire head glowed a rosy shade of pink. She tried to close her eyes, but it was pointless. She tried to turn away, but it was still there. She tried to look straight ahead, pretending it was not there, but alas, Mr. Frost's staff was still dangling, fully erect, right onto her line of sight. He gave it one last wiggle before the Queen rose to her feet.

"Put that away!" ordered Queen Elsa. Her fingertips sparkled with electric blue static. Tiny snowflakes began to crystallize by the tips of her fingers. Her open palm was coated with a hazy hue of blue, and all around them (although Mr. Frost could not feel it), the temperature dropped down considerably.

But instead of feeling afraid, Mr. Frost smirked. "I'd put it away if you played with it." The queen blushed such a furious shade of red, that her head glowed brighter.

"Jack Frost, how inappropriate!" cried Queen Elsa.

Mr. Frost's smile disappeared, and instead he glared. He bared his teeth into a snarl, and he growled. It was a sound that rumbled so deep from his chest that Queen Elsa felt a pull in her own; as if she was drawn to the sound he made. "Oh, is it now?" Mr. Frost leapt to his feet, his staff still dangling in plain sight, and he lowered himself onto her desk. Light as a feather, he hardly rustled the stacks of paper. Now all Queen Elsa could see was the staff he _still _refused to put away. "Is it inappropriate when all I'm doing is showing you my most _basic_ need? Isn't it as inappropriate when I tell you I'm hungry when my stomach is rumbling? When I say I'm thirsty when I am parched? Tell me, _your highness_, how something so _primal _as _this_ be inappropriate?" The way he spoke was guttural but the words rolled off his pale tongue like honey.

Queen Elsa gasped. Her cheeks were aflame. "B-but... not here... not now... Someone may... walk in..."

_Snap! _Mr. Frost snapped his fingers, and a trail of snow blossomed from his feet all the way to the wooden double doors. They were frozen shut in an instant, and the queen knew that even if her guards burnt it down, Mr. Frost's icy barricade would hold. "Anything else?"

The queen was beginning to panic, for when Mr. Frost was in _this _mood, he was not very pleasant, or very gentle. Her icy eyes darted back and forth, trying to find an opening with which she might escape to, but alas, the room was sealed. When she realized this, she sighed. "I-nothing. No more. Let's just... get this over with..."

Mr. Frost's fierce glare evaporated like a puddle of water on a scorching summer day. His grin was back and he eagerly leapt on the queen's desk. He sat down and his legs dangled on either side of her. He propped them comfortably on her armrest, effectively trapping her. His ice-cold toes gently traced her bare arms. The queen shuddered, but she was certain it was not from the cold that never bothered her anyway.

Jack peered down at her from his perch on her desk. His eyelids drooped, and his thick eyelashes framed his crystal blue eyes perfectly. Elsa shyly glanced up to meet his eyes. Blushing profusely, she slowly, gradually, lowered her head to meet his protruding staff. Mr. Frost groaned in anticipation.

And Elsa blew.

In contrast to the blazing heat of the Arendelle summer, the queen's ice cold breath came out in a puff of smoke that billowed and coated the head of Mr. Frost's staff. Where her breath made contact with it, frost blossomed in the shape of her signature snowflake. Jack shifted in his seat to adjust to the growing sensation undulating from his staff, creeping up all the way to the rest of his body.

For about five minutes, Elsa kept blowing puffs of her icy breath onto Mr. Frost's staff, until he planted his palm on her blonde head. Panting, Jack croaked, "Okay. No more." This time, it was the queen who smirked.

"Oh? Not so tough now, are you, big boy?" She crooned, as she stood up. She gripped Mr. Frost's outstretched legs and wrapped them around her middle. And then-_grab_! She reached for his staff, and Jack cried in surprise. But the sound was not unpleasant, and Elsa felt the tug once more. So she gripped his staff, firmer this time, and she transferred her magic onto him the same way she did with her breath.

But with the more solid contact, the magic grew stronger. The frost pattern became more vivid and more dynamic. She kept transferring her powers onto him in small but successive bursts of energy, and she kept it up until she could feel exhaustion creeping onto her system, and only when she was panting herself and soaked with sweat did she stop.

With one last tug, she sent them both over the edge.

Snow and ice exploded from their point of contact, and Mr. Frost and Queen Elsa were literally blown away. Elsa landed on her chair, but Mr. Frost had barely enough time to regain his senses to somersault in midair and keep himself from careening straight into the barricaded door. "Whoa." He panted as he zipped forward once more. "That was amazing."

Queen Elsa smiled in satisfaction. "Thank you. I needed that... release."

"Don't mention it." Mr. Frost winked as he twirled his wooden staff expertly on his wrist. Admiring the queen's handiwork, he said, "This is a really cool trick you've got there, Elsa. Because your magic is alive as you are, whatever damage you repair on my staff, it reinforces my own powers as well." Mr. Frost said, glancing at the tired queen. "But it looks like the transfer drains you every time. I'm sorry I'm so pushy. I just get... restless when my staff gets damaged."

Elsa smiled despite her weariness. "I understand that, Jack. And I know that if I'd get in trouble, you'd do the same for me."

The feral glint was suddenly back in his eyes, and they burnt brighter than ever. "Of course I'd do the same for you." Said Mr. Frost in a low, silky manner. He stalked forward. The queen straightened in her seat but made no move to run. "Now. This isn't the only _staff _that needs _special attention_."

* * *

**I'd like to properly apologize for the delay with the new chapter. I had this material for so long, I don't even know why I never decided to post it right away. Anyway, I had another Chapter 3 lined up, but I thought it was a tad too dark than the usual content, so I eventually decided against it. Maybe I'll put it up one of these days, who knows? But for now, I'll stick with my light-hearted guns.**

**Thank you all so much for the love you gave this story. It's not much, compared to what other authors receive, but it's wonderful and amazing still and you guys don't know how happy you make me each time you give me feedback. Please continue supporting this series! Hopefully, it'd motivate me to dish out new chapters on a more frequent basis. :)**


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